To foreign banksters, oligarchs and Colombians only.

Given the supply shortage and my natural proclivity to arbitrage every asset I own, I have decided to sell my iPad.

Delivered by overnight mail to any location on earth against receipt of cleared funds (used notes, non sequentially numbered are preferred) the price is a modest $1,999, shipping included. See below for important update. For a small premium to the retail price you can hold tomorrow in your hands today, or at least by Friday, if you get my drift.

Hang on a minute – this just in from HQ:

OK, scrap that earlier price. Yours for $3,999.