Google Translate

For other languages.


Read this journal in English.
Lire ce journal en français.
Leggi questo giornale in lingua italiana.
Lea esta revista en español.
Lesen Sie diese Zeitschrift in deutscher Sprache.
קרא את היומן הזה עברית.
日本でこの雑誌を読んでください。
閱讀這份期刊在中國。

English, French, Italian, Spanish, German, Hebrew, Japanese, Chinese – that should about cover it.

My mail box suggests that some readers of this journal do not read English so, to accommodate them, I have added on-the-fly foreign language translation using Google Translate.

Click a language choice in the right hand drop-down menu and you will see something like the following almost instantly (this illustration is in a language I really care about):

In one of the most beautiful languages known to man.

Granted, the translation may not be the greatest but it suffices at a pinch. I count 57 language choices in addition to English and for the imminent arrival of the day when our new Chinese masters march into free nations’ capitals, I have made bloody well sure you can get Chinese. Of course, I will doubtless be among the first lined up against the brick wall for the poor quality of the translation. Or for actually having an opinion. Or something.

A nation that makes billions of Macs has no words for ‘Lightroom’ or ‘QTVR’ ….

Sorry, no American option. This journal is written, for the most part, in the Queen’s English and residents of certain former colonies will have to make do with that. And if you switch to Chinese, I can confirm that it’s sheer hell trying to get the right choice to revert to English .


* * * * *

An Englishman’s way of speaking absolutely classifies him.
The moment he talks he makes some other Englishman despise him.
One common language I’m afraid we’ll never get,
Oh, why can’t the English learn to

set a good example to people whose
English is painful to your ears?
The Scots and the Irish leave you close to tears.
There even are places where English completely disappears.

In America, they haven’t used it for years!

Why can’t the English teach their children how to speak?
Norwegians learn Norwegian,
the Greeks are taught their Greek.
In France every Frenchman knows his language from “A” to “Zed”

The French never care what they do, actually, as long as they pronounce it properly.

Arabians learn Arabian with the speed of summer lightning,
The Hebrews learn it backwards,
which is absolutely frightening.
But use proper English and you’re regarded as a freak.

Why can’t the English,
Why can’t the English,
Learn To Speak?

‘My Fair Lady’, lyrics by Alan Jay Lerner (who was an American
though he did go to a proper English school!)